Recently, something very interesting happened in my life in a very short moment. That incident demonstrated so many things to me. That is the reason why I felt like writing a post on it.
I share food and drinks with all my friends. On one day, I drank my friend’s fruit juice. She immediately said, “I cant drink the juice now, I am on fasting, so I cant drink defiled juice…”. Immediately I said “oooo… I am so sorry. Anyway you keep fasting to satisfy your mother. So please drink it”. she said “No I cant”. I said “why didnt you tell me before I drank?”. She said “ya, mistake is mine!”. I said, “no yaar, no one can stop like that. So leave it, I will get another drink for you…”.
Here, if we look at emotional dynamics, we understand deeper concepts. When I forced her to drink, I was actually attacking her belief system just to get rid of my guilt. Then I blamed her. She also fell into guilt for making me guilty. So it was a swirl of guilt and blame.
We do this at larger scale. We push other people into guilt and blame to come out of our own guilt without even realizing. We also attack belief systems of others. We do all sorts of things instead of finding a simpler solution.